Andrew is not a crime

by W. Andrew Powell

Every so often this one comes along, and every time it’s just as funny. Check out the Googlism for “Andrew”…

Andrew is a f$%&ing genious
(I must be a genius, I can spell it right!)

Andrew is conducting cruel scientific experiments
Andrew is waxing megalomaniacal again

Andrew is beautiful
Andrew is nationally renowned for his rich warm voice
Andrew is your single source for complete antenna
Andrew is in line for achievement
(Behind who, exactly?)

Andrew is responsible for me buying these
(And aren’t they fabulous?)

Andrew is either very optimistic or very naive
(A little bit from column A, a little bit from column B.)

Andrew is one month old
Andrew is 11 months old
Andrew is 7
andrew is 11
andrew is 40
Andrew is approximately 319
Andrew is not old
(Time flies when you’re having fun – at least I’m not old though.)

Andrew is devoted to encouraging personal evangelism

Andrew is designed and intended to glorify God

Andrew is blatantly dishonest
(That’s a lie!)

Andrew is regularly taking personal initiatives to make the world a better place
(Why, just the other day I gave someone a chocolate.)

Andrew is cool
Andrew is very sick
(And that’s cool, right?)

Andrew is a two
Andrew is a 6
Andrew is upgraded to category 5
(I hope those are all out of 5.)

Andrew is nudistes hot hooters
(I really wish I knew what that meant.)

Andrew is a hit with the ladies in Chile
(But Canadian women hate me.)

Andrew is a hot hung tan stud that has a
(Yes, go on. Has a…?)

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